On the channel, commenters will frequently write, "Why waste so much time on Narcissism? Just cut ties and walk away."
As much as I would like to do this, I can't. I have seen the devastating long-term effects of exposure to a narcissist. It withers the human soul from the inside out. It derails entire lives. It drains and disposes of the life force.
Many of my subscribers will tell the story of how they are now in their 50's attempting to rebuild their lives from the damage. My goal, my mission, is to prevent excessive amounts of time from being spent on and with these people. I want to teach people to identify the signs so they can either stop the relationship before it starts, or begin to plan their exit strategies.
As long as this disorder persists, I will persist. I want people to be happy and free, and I want to bring narcissism to the end it deserves.
Oh yes, please stay on the mission. I'm ashamed to say it, but true, I married a Narcissistic man. The signs are so true. I could never, for years, put my finger on it and figure him out to solve this crazy yet mysterious puzzle, and save myself. But by God's grace and mercy over time He showed me hold to handle him and the root cause to his behavior. "Fruit doesn't fall far from the tree" of its rooted environment. Now, I totally get it and it constantly opened doors to other people like this. But it wasn't until, September 8, when my bosses called me in to give me my teaching review. The students (at a career College) loves me and my teaching....but their review of me was opposite. "It was said to me that they are not learning anything" ok, who said it? " I can't tell you that." Now, that's messed up and shook me so bad along with other previous stuff done and said to me there... THAT I literally cried in their presence......and in the spirit all I can see is her, the boss, like an iron cladden geared up fighter like a character from Thunder cats, stroking his cat's yarn with those razor sharp fingers, plucking a' loose one string at a time, me. Taring my life, shelf esteem, my confidence, my way of thinking and loving on God one string at a time. It was then, among other job firings and mistreatments that damaged me, that I decided to resign without looking back. Of course I prayed and consulted God before I did this. And I did 6am via email the next morning.....SO LIBERATING! Off course I have greater peace, greater Victory, and I'm not crazy as I was told before. God even blessed me with me with a long term sub job that I can be proud of and adored by, still teach career College at night too but elsewhere, and about to rebirth my healthcare business. Thank you for your videos. Thank you for your awesome ministry to set the captives free of the "unknown" predator. It's sad,but never late, I'm 16years married in this and 47 years old. Now I can recognize and handle my marriage better, stay away from these types of people, and live life better. Again thank you and continue prayer for your ministry and hopefully donate soon. :)
ReplyDeleteYayyyy! Keep it up!!! You’re rock-solid in your assessment of the damage unhealthy narcissism does to individuals, families and organizations...and sometimes entire populations (as when a narc comes to political power). Please keep doing your awesome work!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much. You have helped me so much. I have been with my narcissist for 30 years and couldn't understand why she behaved like she does.Why no matter how hard I work at work or on the house just doesn't matter to her. She does everything that I have heard from all of you beautiful women have said.And she has raised my daughter to be a low level narcissist as well. I am so entangled with this woman that she would blow everything up if I left her. But now that I understand I can begin healing and figuring out how to untangle myself.She blows up at the littlest things I say that she doesn't like. It is not easy living with a person like that!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Marie, for all your perceptive contributions that have helped me out so much! I have been aware of people with bad behavior and I wasted a year (with a few breaks coz my narc was hospitalized for loosing it 4x's in a 6 month period) but essentially I had heard this term, but I had no idea what it entailed. My narc and I had a platonic relationship although he did try to weasel his way into my bed I knew from the moment I saw him interact with other people that that would never happen between us as this his m.o. in controlling women; oh, and men since he has a penchant for transgender men. All in all I am a very strong loner and I thought I was in control of the situation, but he started to become more and more aggressive (physically). I had my daughter come over and she handled him with compassion, but told him I wanted him to leave. We parted ways as friends. As time has gone by I no longer exist since he had tried to convince he had changed and I refused to put anymore effort into the situation. I am so glad that I ran into your youtube videos coz I was having panic attacks and felt very queer. I could not figure out why since it was after the fact. So, by listening to your videos I have gleaned a wealth of information as to why this type of person chose me and I am grateful to know that I can change some of my behavior so as to stop this type of attraction coming to me. I am wide awake! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Much love and many blessings!
ReplyDelete